The girl who will never get the chance

I looked at the tree where I had asked my brother to wait for me, but he wasn't there. I knew it actually. I have been doing that every morning since it happened. Then I looked at the tall and seemingly new building, again as usual. Every morning I wake up to find myself sitting on this rock in front of this building which housed my family once, I think so!

*

Ours was a small and normal upper middle class family, mom, dad, my little brother and myself. We had recently shifted in our new flat somewhere in this huge building. Every morning all of us used to leave home together, mom and dad for their offices and brother and I for our school. As an elder sister I was not only protective and possessive about my brother, but also used to bully him quite often, hurting him little too much sometimes, like I did that day. I don't know if it was because I was too protective about him or for some other reason, but I was quite harsh with him and was quite clear about what he can do and what he must not. But I really cared for him.

On that afternoon, when we both came home from school, I felt he was quite happy for something. May be he had learnt some new trick in school today. He entered the kitchen with his dirty uniform and shoes on, and obviously I didn't like it. In absence of mom and dad, I was the self proclaimed incharge of the house and my little brother. I shouted at him and asked him to change and go to bathroom first. But he was not in the mood or may be, now I feel, he was too hungry to do all that. So before he touched anything there, I held his hand and dragged him to the bathroom and pushed him inside. As usual he didn't react and I went to the kitchen to see what mom had cooked for lunch. We ate without talking much and after making sure he was only watching TV peacefully, I went to the study room and opened my school bag to plan my homework.

After some time, just to check whether he fell asleep while watching TV, I went to the living room to find he wasn't there. Surprised I went to the kitchen. There he was, with an empty ball pen refill in his mouth, bent on the gas burner trying to blow a balloon from that melting refill! Shouting as loud as I could, I pulled him down from kitchen platform and gave a tight slap. I put the burner off, snatched the refill form his hand and threw it on floor. While doing that, I accidentally ended up throwing some molten plastic on his arm too! I quickly removed that hot plastic from his skin and took him to wash-basin to pour some water on his arm. By now both of us had tears in our eyes, for different reasons. I thought he must be hating his sister, without knowing how much she cares for him.

I kept staring at the burn mark on his arm while he was sleeping, thinking why do I always end up hurting him, while trying to protect him. I didn't know what was right and what was wrong. Suddenly I felt the bed shaking vigorously. Realising it was an earthquake, I woke him up and pulled him to the door, rushed to the staircase and then to ground floor. Everyone was running and trying to reach the playground in front of our building. Both of us were very frightened and he hugged me tight with fear, completely unaware of what was happening. All of us were looking at our tall building and we saw it happening slowly. With lot of cracks running all over the walls, we saw it leaning slowly to one side. It didn't fell though. It was too hot outside and we weren't wearing any footware. My little brother was still in shock and was unable to stand on that hot playground soil. I looked at the burn mark on his arm and decided something. I asked him to stand under that tree till I came back and ran to our building. I heard someone shouting at me asking me not to go there, but I wanted to get him some water to drink and his chappals, I badly wanted to do something for him, something which didn't hurt him and showed him I really care for him. I had no fear then, till I saw our old neighbour granny sitting on the staircase shouting for help. May be she was alone at home and couldn't make it to the groundfloor with her paining knees. I told her I will be back in a second and will take her out of building. As I climbed one more floor, the building started shivering again, this time even more vigorously. I kept running to reach to our flat, with plaster and bricks falling everywhere. I kept climbing steps.

*

I was standing in the door which opened to the terrace, and I realised somehow I couldn't find my house till I reached terrace! How is it possible? Even if we had shifted to this new house only a month ago, I cannot fail to locate my own house in the building! I started running down to search for my house, and felt these are not the same steps I used to climb up. I reached ground floor, ran to the tree across the road where my little bro was waiting for me. But he wasn't there. I was very tired and frightened, I badly wanted to find him before my parents returned, and tell him that I loved him. But he was not there. After gathering some breath I ran to the bulding again. I couldn't understand what was happening. I climbed all the floors and reached the terrace again without finding my home! No, its impossible, I must find my house. I kept running from one door to the other, on every floor in that seemingly new building. Everytime I felt 'this must be my house', I found strangers living there or huge padlocks on the door. But I could not find my house. I sat on the steps, tired, on the verge of crying. I realised I even didn't see our old granny while I was climbing up and down all the steps. The next moment I felt she was standing behind me. I looked at her and started crying. She pulled me in her arms. I asked her why am I not able to find my house, my brother and if she can call my parents from their office. She kept patting my forehead and I don't remember exactly but I fell asleep on the steps soon, while I was telling her how I ended up hurting my brother today with the molten refill.

*

I woke up in the morning to find myself sitting on this rock in front of the seemingly new building which once housed my family..... I looked at the tree where I had asked my brother to wait for me. He wasn't there and I knew it actually! I have been searching for my house in that building for so many days. The building which is surprisingly looking new if not the same!
I have asked every single person in this building, about my house, my brother, my parents, but no one paid any attention to me, except for the granny who sometimes sits beside me on the staircase. I have been doing this for I don't know how many days, but I cannot leave this place, this building, this tree. My brother might have gone to drink some water, he will be back anytime and I will tell him how much I love him. But I still don't know how it is possible that I can't identify my own house and why people don't even look at me when I call them! They ignore me as if I don't exist! as if......I don't exist....

"END"
(for those innocent mortals who didn't get it, this is (again an imaginary) story of a little girl (rather her ghost), who died in an earthquake while trying to fetch water for her brother, the brother whom she cared for but could never share a kind word with. She died before she could tell him how much she loved him. Lucky you, now that you are reading this, don't you think you still have a chance?)
(ohh and by the way, her ghost couldn't find her house because the building was completely destroyed in earthquake, and a new building was constructed there later!)