You are beautiful!

One day your eyelashes will turn white, one day your lips will be covered with wrinkles and so will be your palm. And I will still say, "you are beautiful!" For, the love in your eyes will still be the same, the smile on your lips will still brighten my day and the warmth of the touch of your palm in my hand will still give me all the strength to overcome the challenges in life. And whenever I will tell you that you are beautiful, I will mean it, irrespective of how you look then, for the real beauty never ages, it only becomes richer and richer with time.
It takes time, not to look beautiful, but to 'be' beautiful, to be perceived beautiful, for you to understand yourselves that you are beautiful. 'Cause the real beauty is something to be experienced and not just seen!
I always wondered what is that makes you look so beautiful, all the time! I knew it is something beyond your beautiful tender skin, your silky hair and your deep black eyes. And then one day I saw you with that baby oil bottle in your hand! Eureka! No, it's not your skin as tender as a baby's, neither your eyes as expressive as a baby's. It's your heart! You have a pure heart, as pure as that of a baby. A heart that brings such a beautiful smile on your lips, the heart that says it all through eyes, without any hesitance, without any hidden intentions. It's this ability of yours to have maintained the purity of heart, which makes you beautiful. It's this lovely spotless heart which makes you happy and smiling about all those tiniest of the things, from a mere thought of having an icecream to making new plans of travelling to places. A happy person always looks beautiful. I can now see all those small things you do and you have to make yourself happy. 'Cause to be happy you need to love yourself, appreciate yourself and be confident about what you are. I wonder if this is what you think about when you sit in front of the mirror, with all those colourful tiny bottles and brushes? Trying to do things to make yourself happy and not exactly beautiful? Or actually giving that beautiful expression of your pure heart, a finishing touch? Yes you are beautiful, and now I know your real beauty is in the happiness you have and the happiness you spread, and that this way you will be beautiful forever!


image from Juliettesunshine.wordpress.com

To indulge in more discussions about realy beauty, visit Yahoo! Real Beauty

Sunset

With hands in my pocket, I am walking towards the setting sun. Its just the sand and the wind whispering around me, even the waves have calmed down after a tiresome day of struggle. The sun is just above its shivering reflection on waves. I subconsciously stand still somewhere, gazing at the sun. At one point of time, the sun gently touches water. I somehow feel the memory of that touch deep within myself.


I stretch my right hand towards yours. I don't feel the touch, instead i keep staring at it... on the reflection of sun.The sun keeps melting in its reflection... slowly... "I want to tell you something", I say while looking at the sun. Coming in front of me, you start melting in my arms. I am still looking at that drowning sun. just few moments... under the golden sky... my eyes now keep wandering on the reflection. Reserving some light for itself, the sun has almost vanished. And so is vanishing, the feeling of your touch in my arms. I am trying to keep track of that disappearing reflection... unsuccessfully.

For a long time now, I am waiting for you, with both my hands still in pockets. The little  golden orange light, left by the sun, makes the pain of your absence a lot more severe. The crazy wind keeps searching for you around my still body. It doesn't even need any sunlight now... just like me....
 
(I a just trying to come back to blogging with this attempted translation of my very old marathi writeup! :) )

Once upon a time in TIME.

Once upon a time, there was a second hand, running inside a wall clock. Always fresh and energetic, he kept running, faster than the minute hand and much faster than the slow lazy hour hand. He was very proud of himself, his speed, his precision, his energy, his successful life! Meeting the 12 numbers every minute, he felt he was popular too! Untill one day, he decided to think about his successful life, or rather the life.

He couldnt afford to stop and think, actually the first thing he realised was that stopping was not in his hands, neither was running! disturbed and disappointed he kept running, round and round and round, reaching nowhere.

He wanted to ask those 12 numbers and the other two hands, what all this meant? And he realised, while trying to keep up with the time, he could never spend enough time with any of them! He realised, he had no control over his speed, motion, perfection, his successful life! He was bound to the pivot. The pivot which gave him the drive to keep running, all his life, in the same manner, in the same boundaries of the wall clock, round and round and round. He really wanted to see what was there, beyond the boundaries of clock, if not time. He wanted to know how it feels to once stop and think, he wanted to know how it is to be not bound to something.

Once upon a time, there was a second hand inside a wall clock, who decided to stop running for life, round and round and round.

जीव गुंतला असा...

जीव गुंतला असा
की शब्द तुझेच ऐकले,
गाणे दाटले गळ्यात
पाणी डोळ्यांत थांबले

नको नवे बंध म्हणता
पाश गुंफत राहिले
रात्र सरली बेधुंदिची
स्वप्न रंगत राहिले

जीव गुंतला असा
की मागे काही ना राहिले,
मन मारी भराऱ्या पिंजऱ्यात
पंख बंदच राहिले
- भावीन

The Last Sunday.

1 route
2 Bikes
3 winters
33 months
825 happy mornings
33,000 km
3,21,750 distinct jerks to spinal cord.
Restart.


Few dreams
some wishes
many people
some friends
few relations
lot of exposure
some lessons
few realisations.
Refresh.

Make new Mistakes (epilogue)

I had talked about this here before.

It took a long time, exactly one year! But I did it.... finally.

It's quite strange and weird when you have to choose from one of the two closely linked things.
Time. Money
Thrill. Fear.
Dreams. Reality.
Self. Family.
Now. Later.
Theoritically the choices seem to be easy. Practically?
:)

9 months

This post (questionnaire) is dedicated to (aimed at) my expecting friends, wives of my colleagues and some relatives etc. Somehow there are many of them this time! (recession?) ;) Enlighten me.

How does it feel, to know that something is growing fast inside your body? Something that you WANT to grow, something that is completely dependent on you, your life, you breathing, your eating. Something that is as good as your own body part, something that will give you a new identity!
How does it feel, to know that when it is fully developed and ready to see the light, it will be the most painful time in your life! And you still want it to grow, the piece of your flesh, which is being nourished on 'your' food, blood, thoughts! How does it feel to wait for that day? The day when you will get the pain, life and identity!
How does it feel to know this, so much in advance? Something that is even slowing down the time, feeling each minute, kicking inside you slowly! Something that demands and gets all your attention, all the time!
How does it feel to know, this is the closest you can ever hold a life to yourself, your own life! Perhaps something much more precious than your own life, because you know, you had never touched your own belly with so much care and love before this! And you know how exactly it feels to exist and move around in an almost different body for few months!
What is that feeling, that you exerience till that day of 'light', amongst all those uncertainties and huge expectations? How does it feel to simultaneously know and not know something? How does it feel to know that only half the human beings can experience this? that is if you didn't consider a farmer's experience and situation worth comparing. The farmer who buries all his earnings in the soil and expects some life to emerge from there! The life that will probably save his life and few more!
How does it feel to end something good, expecting something better will start? And to be mentally ready, rather willing for it, 9 months in advance!

(update: Aakanksha gave me this link to a supposedly amazing video named 'in the womb'. Will watch it soon!)

Stories and Trees

This was a long due post and now I don't even remember how I thought about the link between type of stories and type of trees. I still haven't thought about this in depth though. With my limited reading statistics, I can provide only 1 or 2 examples of each type! :)

Palm Stories: These are generally plain looking and not so interesting stories at first look. The story teller takes enough time to build the base for the story. It requires you to go on reading till you reach the top point (high-point as it is called), to really enjoy and understand the story. Examples can be some good humour stories (jokes?) or even some travelogues etc.

e.g. Jonathan Livingston Seagull

Bush Stories:

The story teller is an ordinary person and so is the topic of his story. The story can be woven around any routine experience or common personalities existing around. Whether the story is interesting or not depends hugely upon the creativity of story teller. There is not much firm basework and main attraction is the surface ornamentation of story (or bush!). Many blog posts fall in this category.

e.g. this post. and this too

Creeper Stories: There exists a huge variety in this little complicated and equally interesting category of stories. They can range from real life experiences to fantacy stories and love stories to murder mysteries. The interesting part is, the branches or supporting parts are almost as strong (or weak) and as important as the main stem. So even if it looks like there is not strong enough base for the story, the strength lies in the complex network of all the characters and their own lives! There are lot many twists and turns and many 'high-points' worth enjoying throughout the length and width of the story, just like flower creepers. You can actually enjoy any part of the story and will be pulled in to trace the start and end, eventually realising its the journey that is more enjoyable than the end points.

e.g. the recent good example is this story by Janaki (part 1 to 10).

Pine Stories: The composition, form, structure, details.... this is what makes these stories worth reading. They are very predictable, like love stories, but the way they are told/narrated, in a very soft romantic poem like manner, makes them enjoyable.

e.g. 2 states by Chetan Bhagat, 50 first dates , bollywood movies like DDLJ etc

Mango Stories: Biographies or even some novels based on real life. A very strong base, strong enough branches,very closely linked to each other and to the environment, very much like mango tree! The concept is very deep rooted and demands your proper involvement and interest in it. This is not just for enjoying the story, it will stay with you for a long time even changing the way you think sometimes. Very inspirational!

e.g. Closest from what I have read till now is Totto Chan, better example can be stories of raja Harishchandra.

Banyan Stories: Epics! I do not have enough words and wisdom to write about them 'in short'! Unlike mango stories, they go beyond the individual reader, to inspire, affect and nurture the whole societies, cultures. They can be interpreted at various levels of literature as well as social evolution. And they are still not boring but very beautiful examples of art!

e.g. Ramayana, Mahabharata, Odyssey etc.

Bonsai Stories:

I would really not like to call them stories! They look like they were made as per marketing demand and requirements. They have everything, but still lack something very important like the scale, gravity, rendering them more of decorative item on the shelf in living room. They simply don't feel original. It's like Bhavin writing his interpretation of Ramayana/King Lear on his blog in one post! Show off!

Ok What is This?

:)

frustration sketches

This is an old concept we had in first few days of NID. I don't remember who named it so, but when we used to get frustrated while trying something worth showing someone, we used to do thes frustration sketches. The idea was to take your frustration out on paper, sketch (if you could call it that) with all the possible negative energy (!) and thinking of pencil as sword most of the time! The joy of showing the outcome (or merely of having finished the pencil or torn the paper etc) could help to get over the frustration! At least it was supposed to work like this :)Talked about this to poorva yesterday and today I felt I needed to do that for myself. The quality of these sketches is not so much enjoyable, may be because of 'not enough level of frustration' or may be because they look unnecessarily clean because of the 'hardware' (wacom tablet) used! :)nice exercise though! :)

क्षण एक थांबण्याचा.....

त्या एका क्षणाला,
वारा वाहायचा थांबतो,
पानांची सळसळ थांबते,
झाडाखाली उतरलेला कावळा
कावरा बावरा होउन बघत राहतो.
उगीच दोन तीन काळे ढग
आकाशात रेंगाळत राहतात.
पाउस नाही पडत,
पण थोडं शहारून येतं.
मन उभ्या उभ्या हरवतं,
भूत - वर्तमानाचा गुंता होतो,
न सोडवावासा वाटणारा.
काही कळेनासं, काही कळू नए असं वाटतं.
मन आणि शरीर, दोघेही स्तब्ध होतात,
सगळ कसं शांत होतं, थांबतं.

ह्या सगळ्यांपासून अनभिज्ञ
डोळ्यांतलं पाणी तेवढं वाहत राहतं!

त्या एका क्षणाला.........

- भावीन

TOUCH sensitive

when was the last time?

you dipped your fingers in a bottle of paint,

and left an almost alive trail on the white paper,

slowly feeling the dryness of paper

or may be of your finger!!

when was the last time?

you felt like biting into the chocolate-soft brick of clay you just made.

or almost licked the remains on your fingers!

and kept re-touching that still-wet vase infinitely,
just because you liked that touch so much!

when was the last time?

you tried cleaning that old antique brass bowl

with some dry coarse powder,

till it turned into a glossy yellow surface!

and smelled fascinating new!

when was the last time?

you made a bunglow of brand new playing cards,

with utmost careful breathing and your gentle hands,

or tried picking up the the glass jar broken into pieces

and learnt what 'careful' actually means!

when was the last time?

your touch gave some life to the material,

and brought a smile on your face,

and realised that sensitivity of your touch,

can do much more than the rectangle on your laptop!

Both images from 'Preschool Crafts' website

Smart Efforts

It takes a lot of efforts to fool yourself.
But then, the trick is, to keep telling yourself, "you were a fool!, weren't you?"

Inception

Cobb: Dreams feel real while we're in them. It's only when we wake up that we realize something was actually strange.

*

Mal: I'll tell you a riddle. You're waiting for a train, a train that will take you far away. You know where you hope this train will take you, but you don't know for sure. But it doesn't matter. How can it not matter to you where the train will take you?

Cobb: Because you'll be together.

*

Mal: You keep telling yourself what you know. But what do you believe? What do you feel?

*

Mal: Do you know what it is to be a lover? Half of a whole?

*

Cobb: Look at you. You're just a shade, a shade of my real wife. How could I capture all your beauty, your complexity, your perfection, your imperfection, in a dream? Yes, you're the best that I can do. But, I'm sorry, you're just not good enough.

*

Ariadne: Why is it so important to dream?

Cobb: Because, in my dreams we are together.

नको

(click to enlarge)

Bridge, The time

How many times have you woken up in the morning, sat on the edge of bed facing window, and kept looking at the golden reflections in the river? How many times have you returned home in the evening, looked out from the window and searched for your camera to capture all the heavenly shades of light in sky and the dancing reflections in the river? I have experienced that for almost an year till date!
Even after spending 2 years in this apartment on the bank of Sabarmati River, I still find it so amazing to look at the bridge from window or balcony... almost every day! The bridge, I feel, is something which has it's own character, feelings, moods and I like to relate to that at different times. The bridge has taken me on many thought journeys, some stretching to hours! The bridge is really capable of taking me to the other side of time.
Following are some of the pictures I took over a period of more than a year, in different seasons, or time of day. There were many more moments worth sharing, but they are captured only in my mind, completely unexplainable in words!

On a rare rainy night in Ahmedabad.

The undisturbed patch of water below the bridge.

On a cool morning in July 2009.

A warm winter evening.

A sunny evening in this monsoon.

10 minutes ago!

:)

Love RED Hate RED

Somehow my clothes (especially white) have a special affinity for red stains, though not the type seen above, but from the ones they are soaked with for washing. It's been happening for years! Whenever I feel I have successfully understood the science of staining, I am taught a new lesson! And the tuition fees are quite high sometimes, considering the 'value' of those clothes. The worst thing is, these laundry accidents happen only after I have worn them for some time and received some compliments! Till that time both the stainer and stainee choose to stay away from each other. And then one fine morning, a new discovery is made. Somehow in every such accident there is only one stainer (mostly red) and only one stainee (mostly white!). All the other not-so-important clothes in the bucket just remain spectators, happily swimming and (secretely) leaving their dirt in the brutal red liquid at the crime scene (bucket). And there I sit, heavy-hearted, segregating the criminal, victim and the spectators in the bathroom, thinking again, someone has shown their real colour today!
:(
Ok, can someone tell me why only a particular fabric gets stained and not every fabric? Also as I have observed, stain is received only from the direct contact with stainer (छूने से फैलती है types) and not from the coloured water in bucket. Why so?
And to all my friends in Apparel, textile and fashion industry, isn't it possible to provide a piece of same fabric with every garment you buy, for stain testing at home?
Found this interesting site/blog in this reference. It has some nice pictures too!

What's in your blood?

कबुतराला गरुडाचे पंख लावता येतील.....

पण गगनभरारीचं वेड रक्तातच असावं लागतं...

कारण आकाशाची ओढ दत्तक घेता येत नाही॥!!!

This can be crudely (and not literally) translated as;

'A pigeon can be given wings of an eagle,

but the craving for flight has to be in blood....

'cause the longing for skies cannot be borrowed!'

(author unknown to me)

I have learned...

The author is still unknown to me! I read this many years ago, but only now I can claim to understand the points mentioned!
(reading tip: the lesser time u spend in deciding whether to read it or not, the sooner you will finish reading it!)
So here it goes...

I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them.
I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people just don't care back.
I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.
I've learned that it's not what you have in your life but who you have in your life that counts.
I've learned that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes. After that, you'd better know something.
I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to the best others can do but to the best you can do.
I've learned that it's not what happens to people that's important. It's what they do about it.
I've learned that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.
I've learned that no matter how thin you slice it, there are always two sides.
I've learned that it's taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.
I've learned that it's a lot easier to react than it is to think.
I've learned that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.
I've learned that you can keep going long after you think you can't.
I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.
I've learned that either you control your attitude or it controls you.
I've learned that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there had better be something else to take its place.
I've learned that heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.
I've learned that learning to forgive takes practice.
I've learned that there are people who love you dearly, but just don't know how to show it.
I've learned that money is a lousy way of keeping score.
I've learned that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.
I've learned that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down will be the ones to help you get back up.
I've learned that sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.
I've learned that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love.
I've learned that just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.
I've learned that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.
I've learned that you should never tell a child their dreams are unlikely or outlandish. Few things are more humiliating, and what a tragedy it would be if they believed it.
I've learned that your family won't always be there for you. It may seem funny, but people you aren't related to can take care of you and love you and teach you to trust people again. Families aren't biological.
I've learned that no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.
I've learned that it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.
I've learned that no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn't stop for your grief.
I've learned that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.
I've learned that sometimes when my friends fight, I'm forced to choose sides even when I don't want to.
I've learned that just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other. And just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do.
I've learned that sometimes you have to put the individual ahead of their actions.
I've learned that we don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change.
I've learned that you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.
I've learned that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.
I've learned that no matter how you try to protect your children, they will eventually get hurt and you will hurt in the process.
I've learned that there are many ways of falling and staying in love.
I've learned that no matter the consequences, those who are honest with themselves get farther in life.
I've learned that no matter how many friends you have, if you are their pillar you will feel lonely and lost at the times you need them most.
I've learned that your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don't even know you.
I've learned that even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help.
I've learned that writing, as well as talking, can ease emotional pains.
I've learned that the paradigm we live in is not all that is offered to us.
I've learned that credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.
I've learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon.
I've learned that although the word "love" can have many different meaning, it loses value when overly used.
I've learned that it's hard to determine where to draw the line between being nice and not hurting people's feelings and standing up for what you believe.

:)

Shadow

Aren't you my shadow? I can't really hold you, neither I can run away from you! All that I can do is, walk into the sun or dip myself in the dark, fooling myself that I have overcome... after every sunset! Only to find you hovering around me every morning I wake up! Struggling to find new ways to fool myself... Sometimes to feel, 'I am the shadow'...Can't do more than existing.... Are you doing the same?

Two Steps Behind

-Def Leppard

Walk away if you want to

It's okay if you need to

You can run but you can never hide

From the shadow that's creeping up beside you

There's a magic running through your soul

But you can't have it all

Whatever you do

I'll be two steps behind you

Where ever you go

And I'll be ther to remind you

That it only takes a minute of your precious time

To turn around

I'll be two steps behind

Take the time to think about it

Just walk the line you know you just can't fight it

Take a look around you'll know what you can't find

Like the fire that's burning up inside me
Now there's a magic running through your soul

But you can't have it all

Whatever you do

I'll be two steps behind you

Where ever you go

And I'll be there to remind you

That it only takes a minute of your precious time

To turn around

I'll be two steps behind

There's a magic running through your soul

But you, you can't have it all
Whatever you do

I'll be two steps behind you

Where ever you go

And I'll be there to remind you

That it only takes a minute of your precious time

To turn around

I'll be two steps behind

(Youtube link here)