Long time ago I read this Marathi article named ‘aatle ani baaherche’, don’t remember whose it was. I also don’t remember exactly what it was related to, but sure I still remember what it meant. The author had said there are only two types of people, ‘insiders’ and ‘outsiders’. I also remember, that thought had influenced my way of perceiving people a lot, especially in public places. It has certainly helped me to accept peoples’ behavior in those
particular situations.
I feel it’s not right to straight away blame someone for their deed without understanding the situation. Let’s take example of a person waiting on railway platform for a local train along with many others. There is nothing special about this. But let the train come and the difference between ‘outsiders’ (i.e. on platform) and ‘insiders’ (i.e. people densely packed in the train) is very visible… and quite violently. Our hero being outsider, can very clearly see lot of space inside for him and tries to explain this to insiders in ‘all the possible’ ways. It’s just beyond his logic why these insiders can’t accept it. On the other hand insiders will do ‘everything’ to convince the outsiders to catch next train or some other compartment…. There is just not even an inch for anyone inside now.
This battle continues for around 30-40 seconds and fortunately our hero manages to get inside the train… hushhhh.. And suddenly he realizes these insiders are trying to accommodate him and his bag clinging somewhere at the end of his palm, and be comfortable (!) themselves! Some of them even share a smile as if to congratulate him for his victorious entry in train! Ohh isn’t that a miracle!!! What is that changed all these people suddenly? These are the same people who were trying their best not to let our hero get in!!! This is what is called ‘insiders – outsiders’ phenomenon! Yes…. Our hero has become insider now… just like every other person in that compartment! He is not their enemy now! Just then the next station comes and our hero starts playing his role as ‘insider’ at his best!!!... forgetting each and every second of his battle as outsider five minutes ago…
No it’s not funny, certainly not! It’s just a very natural phenomenon. So natural that it holds good for almost all the battles in life. May it be a politician changing party, or your bachelor friend getting married (‘kyun ki saans bhi kabhi bahoo thi’ is the simplest to understand I guess), or a person cursing rickshawala for his reckless driving (till he himself gets in one!).This is just true everywhere… A person is not to be blamed, it’s just the matter of whether he is on same side of crowd as you are or not! It’s so simple!
Understanding and accepting this phenomenon has helped me keep my head a lot of times… hope it does work for you too!!!...
:)
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